Tag: bookblog

Book Review

Everything Beautiful Is Not Ruined: A Book Review

ShaziaLeave a comment

Let me tell you a little story about how a book found it’s way to me. I usually go into a bookstore with a plan. Even on the days when I casually decide to stroll into a bookstore, the wheels in my head begin turning as I shuffle through the file labeled “To Be Read” in my brain.  On this particular day, I was visiting the books I wanted as they sat pretty on the bookshelves when I noticed a book placed in the wrong section. Of course my OCD got the better of me and I picked it up to return it to its proper place (maybe I should start working in Indigo). I never made it to where it should be placed, because I decided it belonged with me.

At first it was the title that drew me in: “Everything Beautiful Is Not Ruined”. I don’t know why but that title made me think and question the the story behind it. Then it was the beautiful cover that caught my attention. The star studded sky and a girl stargazing truly deserves cover appreciation. Finally, reading the excerpt is what made me decide to bring it home. I’m really grateful this book found me because it seems to be one of those underrated gems.

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Synopsis:

“My demon is you. My best and worst is about you: how I need you and fear for you, how I fear for myself if I lose you, how I have let myself be defined by you.” – Danielle Younge-Ullman.

This story is about a teenage girl name Ingrid and her mother. When she was younger, Ingrid travelled the world with her Opera singing mother, as she put on dazzling performances and received acclaim. When Ingrid’s mother loses her voice and career, their glamorous life comes to an end as they settle for a normal life filled with ghosts from their past. After a childhood with life altering moments and becoming an adult at a young age, Ingrid decides she wants to pursue her dream of becoming a singer.

The catch: Ingrid is challenged to complete a wilderness survival program in order to gain her mother’s approval for her career path. The other catch: The wilderness program is for a group of at risk teens consisting of runaways, ex-convicts and shady personalities. Ingrid spends her days in this gruelling program with a group of teens that make her feel uncomfortable, all the while trying to understand what she is doing there and working through years worth of pent up emotions and memories.

The Characters:

Ingrid put me through one hell of an emotional roller coaster. This book gives us flashbacks to Ingrid’s childhood, which helps us understand why she turned out the way she did. It is also written in the form of letters to her mother while she is at the wilderness camp. I truly enjoyed these parts because the writing was so sarcastic and really indicative of a teenage girl having an awful time at camp and life in general. Besides that, the most powerful thing about the letters is how her emotions completely boil to the surface. There is no sugar-coating how she feels about her past or present, and I do believe you get to know her character better with these scenes.

The Mother is an important character that we learn about through Ingrid’s flashbacks and letters. This is a difficult character to read about as you feel her pain jumping out of the pages as she describes losing her life’s passion. You feel angry about the way she treats Ingrid and how she tries to crush her dreams. Mainly, you just want her to pull through during her dark times.  

Andreas is a secondary character who begins dating Ingrid’s mother in the book. Andreas definitely became one of my favorite characters due to his endearing actions towards Ingrid and her mother. I loved reading the dynamic between him and Ingrid. Of course, the author did a great job in not making him appear too perfect but showing how sometimes your greatest flaw is how relentless you can be to help those who do not want to be “fixed”.

I especially enjoyed getting to know the group of misfit teens at the wilderness camp. Reading about their backstories and why they were doing this program was one of the most interesting parts of the book. The ex-convict Tavik ended up becoming one of my favorite characters from the camp. I’m not really sure when I started liking him, but suddenly I was on board with his character and wished we got more of him.

My Thoughts:

This has to be one of the most profound books with a theme of mental illness explored through the characters. Not only is mental illness viewed from the perspective of the person living with it, but it also explores how those around the person are affected. The symptoms, the challenges, the triggers and road to recovery are all explored and incredibly depicted in this story. There is a bit of a love story, but I did not care much for this part of the book. However, I do think that the backstory between Ingrid and this boy was essential and really well written. The way the story unfolds is also very fluid and easy to follow. Even though I saw that twist coming in the end, it was remarkably written for me to still feel it.

Let me just end this by saying that Goodreads compared this book to The Breakfast Club, which is my favorite movie of all time. I only read this comment after I was done with the book and I can tell you that “Everything Beautiful Is Not Ruined” definitely has some Breakfast Club vibes. Besides that, it explores depression, pursuing your dreams, young love, bullying and family. This is a young adult fiction but I truly believe it is a book anyone can read and enjoy. I highly recommend this book and I hope it snuggles its way into your heart.

Happy reading bookworms!

Shazia.

 

 

Book Review

Book Review: Girl, Stop Apologizing by Rachel Hollis

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*Thank you to HarperCollins Canada for sending me a copy of this book for an honest review.

Let me start off by saying that the title of this book is what really caught my attention at first. I have heard of Rachel Hollis before, but I did not read her first book nor did I follow her on social media. Being a polite Canadian who apologizes when other people bump into me is the reason why I was drawn to the book because of the title. Girl, I really do need to stop apologizing. After reading the excerpt, I realized this book is meant for women to go after their goals and stop apologizing for their ambition. I decided to read it because I have a set of goals that I hope to achieve and thought I could use a dose of motivation.

“Girl, Stop Apologizing” is about embracing who you are and what you are meant to do without apologizing. This book tells you to stop waiting for permission and let go of excuses that stop you from moving forward. I completely agree with the main message and I fully support empowering women and going after your dreams. This book is set up into three parts: excuses to let go of, behaviors to adopt and skills to acquire. Each section draws upon the author’s personal experiences from her business, family and love life.

Unpopular book opinion time:

“Girl, Stop Apologizing” fell flat for me for a number of reasons, which I will get into shortly. The concept of the book is what I can stand behind, but it was the content that was troubling. However, I’m well aware that this book has been well received and considered helpful for many women. Did I feel more inspired and motivated when I finished this book? No, I did not. Should you read it and see for yourself? Yes, you should. 

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“By embracing your calling and refusing to hide your glow, you wouldn’t just make your world brighter, you’d light the way for the women who come behind you.” – Rachel Hollis

The Positives:

            I tried my best to dig for the positives and I did find a few points that are important and helpful. When it comes down to it, Rachel is a business woman. She has adopted a discipline to getting work done effectively and in a timely fashion. I did enjoy the parts where she discusses procrastination, distractions and making time for your goals despite your already hectic schedule. She does provide some helpful advice on how to go all in for your goals. One of the things that resonated with me the most was how she discusses “work environment”. Setting up a workspace is great but the reality is life becomes chaotic at times. Rachel suggests getting work done whenever you have a moment, even if it is in a cramped up space at an airport as you are waiting for your flight. While this is logical, I do think many of us believe that we will be the most productive when we are seated at our desks surrounded by motivational quotes or in a quiet café with Sam Smith playing in the background (that is what a productive workspace looks like to me at least).

I do believe that working mothers will relate to the section in which Rachel discusses the guilt of going back to work. She uses her personal experience and the emotions she felt during the time she was building her business. I found this portion of the book showed her vulnerability and it was particularly well written. Even though I am not a mother, I was able to see the world through a working mom’s eyes.

The Negatives:

I absolutely love books that focus on self-growth and development, however this book seemed to focus more on external factors. There were many pages filled with references to celebrities, weight loss, plastic surgery and appearance. I would have rather read about the internal factors that become barriers to success. While Rachel did discuss internal factors like self-confidence and self-doubt, I felt that the majority of the book brought attention to the external. The author’s wealth was another thing that stood out of the pages for me. I know the author worked hard to build her business and I’m not holding it against her for becoming a wealthy woman. It just becomes hard to relate to someone when they speak of aiming for expensive vacations and first class flights.

Rachel used personal examples to help drive her point home, but I felt like she missed the target by doing this a few times. I had a hard time relating to her experiences and her goals. One of Rachel’s goals was to make it on the New York Times bestseller list. I agree that this is an ambitious goal and good for you for reaching for the stars! Would I call it a failure that she did not end up on the NYT bestseller list right off the bat? No, I would not. However, a good portion of the chapter is dedicated to how she failed in front of eight hundred and fifty thousand people when she did not make it on the list. I had trouble seeing this as a failure; in fact I was thinking to myself how lucky she is to have been published in the first place. Discussions about the number of social media followers and bestseller lists felt like materialistic goals to me. I am also aware that all of us have our own goals that are materialistic, but when I read a self-development book I would rather be reading about goals that help you grow.

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Overall, “Girl, Stop Apologizing” did have some positive points that could help motivate women to stop being ashamed of their ambition and take the step towards their dreams. There were definitely some pieces of advice that could help improve productivity. However, there were quite a few ideas that were problematic for me. I think this is one of those books that either works for you or it does not. If any of you are thinking of reading this book I hope that you will have a different experience than me. That is the beauty of books: it is all in the reader’s interpretation.

Happy reading!

Shazia.

Book Events

HCC Frenzy Presents Spring Preview 2019

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This past weekend I had the opportunity to attend HCC Frenzy’s Spring Preview at HarperCollins in Toronto. Bloggers, booktubers and bookstagrammers were welcomed to HarperCollins to get a sneak peak of their spring line up of books. Being invited to an event like this felt like a dream. In fact, it took me a while to believe this was actually happening. It was only on the day of the event as I made my way through downtown Toronto on an exceptionally windy day that I realized my dream of seeing the inside of a publishing company was about to come true. If you think I’m being dramatic now just you wait!

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HCC Frenzy Presents Spring Preview:

Let me start off by saying that it is a beautiful thing seeing a whole bunch of bookworms in a room together. The energy was infectious. You could find all the attendees with their phones out, adding each other on bookstagram and chatting about their excitement. I was very nervous about going to this event alone but I was overwhelmed by how kind and approachable everyone was from the moment I stepped into the building. It occurred to me how easy it is to connect with people when you share the same passion. I met so many wonderful people and had such fun conversations. The mingling and games were by far my favorite part of this event.

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It has been a dream of mine to step foot inside a place like this just to see where all the magic happens. What did it feel like? Well, it felt like magic of course! (Told you I would be getting more dramatic). The environment felt so calm and welcoming. The stack of books at the entrance me squeal as it displayed some of my favorite books.

HCC Frenzy Spring Lineup:

The Spring Preview was everything. And by everything I mean I wanted all of the books presented pronto/stat. We were given a short presentation on each book and you could feel the collective excitement within the room. Our TBR lists just got bigger! We were each given three ARCS in our swag bags and I was lucky enough to snag these three books:

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“The Wise and Wicked” by Rebecca Podos:
 This is a Russian inspired fantasy about a family in which the women possess the magical ability to see when they will die. But what happens when one of these women passes away and the death does not match the predicted time? Does this mean the rest of the women can fight against the death date allotted to them? I mean Russian inspired magical realism with a bit of a mystery? Sign me up!

“With the Fire on High” by Elizabeth Acevedo
This is a novel about a Latina girl facing personal struggles all the while dreaming of her passion, which can be found in the kitchen. As a foodie, I appreciate this storyline already. This author is known for her highly successful book “Poet X”. Fun fact: when people gasp when they find out you haven’t read a certain book, that is a pretty good indicator that you need to get on it. I’m definitely going to read Poet X but this ARC is my priority. Until then, gasp away!

“Nocturna” by Maya Moraine
This story revolves around a face shifter and a Prince coming together to vanquish an ancient power that they unleashed into the world. Let’s be real for a second. You had me at face shifter. Maybe it’s all the Game of Thrones I watch (huge Arya Stark Fan) but I have not read another storyline quite like this one. I’m really intrigued and excited to read all the face shifting action.

Besides the three books I got, every other book presented sounded incredible. Don’t believe me? Have a look for yourself:

See? Told you they look amazing! It astonishes me how much the young adult genre has grown and how many of these books push boundaries and tackle important issues. These beauties will be released in the spring but you can preorder them and find out more about these books at HarperCollins Canada.

Each of us also got a sampler of Gena Showalter’s upcoming book “The Evil Queen”, which is a story told from the perspective of the Evil Queen from Snow White. I read the sampler on my flight home and I’m extremely interested in reading the rest. This may be the most unique retelling I’ve read based on the first two chapters in this sampler.

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The Swag Bag:

Apart from all the excitement from the presentation, we were also spoiled with a swag bag that included the ARCS but also some additional items. I took my swag bag to a corner Starbucks to check out all the other contents. I was quite excited and the fellow coffee drinkers around me felt and saw the excitement. Spotted: a small Montrealer losing her mind in a Toronto Starbucks while unloading contents from a super cool tote bag. I took a proper picture when I got back to my hotel and here it is:

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Angie Thomas Book Signing:

While I did not want to leave HarperCollins because I absolutely loved the vibe, it was time to see Angie Thomas at the Art Gallery of Ontario. Yes folks, I met the Queen. We took a walk together to the AGO (check me out with my Torontonian lingo) and talked all things books until we arrived. Angie is such an eloquent speaker and so effortlessly conveys the global issues regarding black lives. It was a true honor to hear her speak. I’ll just gloss over the fact that I babbled utter gibberish as she signed my book. I was that start stuck.

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Final Thoughts About Frenzy Presents:

I cannot adequately convey how much I enjoyed this event and how much the whole experience meant to me. Along with living my bookish dream, I met so many kind and talented book influencers and staff working at HarperCollins. The entire day exceeded my expectations. I’m beyond grateful for this experience and extremely eager to start reading these beautiful Arcs. Thank you to HCC Frenzy and HarperCollins for including me in this fun filled day. 

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Until next time bookworms!

Shazia.

Bookish Thoughts

Khanlibrary’s Favorite Books

ShaziaLeave a comment

“Hey Shazia, you’re a big reader…Do you have any book recommendations for me?”

I get asked this question a lot and I love it when I do! I usually burst out into a big dorky grin, clasp my hands together and start listing books by genre. I often wish I had an office where I could ask the person to have a seat, pour them some tea and unveil a portfolio of all my favorite books. Sadly, there is no office but I do have a mental portfolio of the recent books that I enjoyed as well as my all-time favorites.

So I would like to invite you into my imaginary office that has a gigantic bookshelf from floor to ceiling and a hot pot of tea with biscuits ready to serve. Please have a seat on the bean bag chair (because comfort is of utmost importance at the office) and let us have a look through the portfolio of my favorite books.

*Side note: my “portfolio” would really be a colourful and highly organized PowerPoint presentation complete with graphs and hilarious memes. But since this is a blog post I will tone it down a notch and just break it down numerically. Enjoy!

1) Favorite fictional book that made me cry:

A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini

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(picture from @khanlibrary)

Alright, let’s just start off by saying nobody makes me cry like Mr. Hosseini. I really hope I get to meet him one day and express how much I love his books. The way he weaves a story together and shows the growth of the characters is truly inspiring. Why do I love this this book so much? It is beautifully written and it makes you feel every emotion. It educates you and opens your mind. It makes you root for the characters, celebrate their victories and cry for their sorrows. While A Thousand Splendid Suns is my favorite book, I also highly recommend any of Khaled Hosseini’s books. Especially “Sea Prayer” as the proceeds will benefit UN Refugee Agency and the author’s foundation 

2) Favorite Memoir that read like a novel:

The Glass Castle by Jeannette Walls

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This was perhaps one of the best-written and insightful memoirs I have ever read. Jeanette takes us along on her journey through her childhood with her eccentric family and all the hardships they faced as they lived their life like nomads. At times this book felt like a novel. All the characters came to life and I was easily able to envision each scene in my head. It was deeply personal and I loved every bit of it.

 

3) Favorite classic that makes me swoon:

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen

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Need I say more? Jane Austen’s classic is well known, as there are many TV specials and retellings of the story out there. The original classic will always be my favorite. I love Mr. Darcy’s awkward ways and Elizabeth’s feisty personality. I loved the entire nutty Bennet family. I have lost count on how many times I’ve read this classic. One thing is for sure; I never get tired of rereading it!

4) Favorite kids series I discovered in my adulthood:

Percy Jackson and the Olympians by Rich Riordon

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I discovered this series in my mid twenties and I read them faster than Zeus’ lightning bolt. What an incredible adventure for both youngsters and adults alike. I enjoyed every single book in this series. I’m a huge fan of Greek mythology so these books were right up my alley. However, I don’t think you need much knowledge about Greek mythology to enjoy this series. 

5) Favorite young adult fantasy that made me want befriend the characters:

Clockwork Angel: The Infernal Devices Trilogy by Cassandra Clare

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Let me start off by saying I HATE love triangles. I always question how characters have got the time for such nonsense. However, here is a series that handles a love triangle perfectly. I loved Tessa, Will and Jem. To this day, I cannot pick which character I love more. The ending was pure perfection! I’m not a fan of the other Shadowhunter books, but this trilogy has my heart.

6) Favorite inspirational book that made me reflect on life:

The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho

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This is the kind of book that teaches you a different lesson every time you read it. I have read this book at three different points in my life and each time I uncovered a new message or thought. The writing is poetic and filled with metaphors and big lessons. There is a quote from the novel that has stuck with me from the very first moment I read it: “And, when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.” It is not only the most memorable quote from the book but my favorite quote in general.

7) Favorite book from my nerdy childhood:

Anne of Green Gables by L. M. Montgomery

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My mom often tells me about my reaction once I finished reading Anne of Green Gables. One of the things I supposedly said at the age of eight years old was that I wished I had a sister like Anne Shirley. I really believe that the first few books you read as a kid really shapes you into the reader you turn out to be. I thank my mom for introducing me to L.M. Montgomery as a kid.

(Special shout out to the Harry Potter series but that was a given. I wanted to include something apart from the obvious).

 

8) Favorite Historical Fiction that held my attention for hours:

The Other Boleyn girl by Philippa Gregory

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Does Henry VIII fascinate anyone else or is it just me? To say this guy had problems is an understatement. He definitely had 99 problems and a Boleyn girl was one of them. I knew a bit about the Boleyn drama before reading the book, but whatever I knew was mainly about Anne Boleyn. I liked that this book focused on her sister and we see things through her perspective.

9) Favorite Self Help book that left me feeling inspired:

Good Vibes, Good Life by Vex King

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I really do feel that some books find you when you need them the most. This was one of those books for me. The author delivers simple, honest advice that seems to hit the mark perfectly. I found myself nodding along with the author’s advice and every so often wanting to shout out “yes! Preach!” but seeing as how I was in public transport at the time I stopped myself.

10) Favorite Middle School book that made me fall in love with reading all over again:

Cue for Treason by Geoffrey Trease

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I loathed being assigned books to read in elementary school. I always wanted to be in control of what I read. However, in Grade 6 everything changed when our teacher made us read “Cue for Treason”. This book was so good that almost every single kid in my class enjoyed reading it. I remember actually having fun while writing my book report because I had so many thoughts and emotions after finishing it. I lost my copy years ago but I was so happy to have found one just a couple of months back at Chapters. It feels like I got a piece of my childhood back.

There you have it folks. While I do have many more amazing books in my portfolio, these are the ones that hold a special place in my heart.

Fun Fact: I strongly considered adding Game of Thrones in the mix but I’m quite angry at the author right now so he was removed from the list until he decides to finish the books ….seriously George, are you waiting for a white walker apocalypse or what? 

Happy Reading,

Shazia.

Book Review

Tell it to the Trees by Anita Rau Badami

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*Thank you to Penguin Random House Canada for sending me a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

 I have to applaud authors who are able to make their stories feel sinister from the very first page. To the point where you are almost holding your breath expecting something bad to happen. You feel the darkness trying to creep its way to the surface and so you keep reading and waiting for the story to go full dark force on you. I waited, I read and unfortunately this book fell flat for me in the end. Did it go full dark force on me? It sure did. This book is dark, but the wrap up of the story did nothing for me.

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Synopsis

“Truth was a shifting, shy thing, like sunlight changing from moment to moment, unknowable even if you spent your life in the heart of it.” – Anita Rau Badami.

Anu is a forty-something woman looking for a secluded retreat to write her book. She comes across the Dharma family’s “back-house” in the quiet town of Merrit’s Point and decides it will be the perfect place to spend some alone time writing. She gets to know the Dharma family and soon realizes there is something sinister happening in their household.

The Dharma family consists of the Vikram, the head of the household who was once married to a wild and free woman named Helen, who tragically died in a car crash leaving behind a daughter, Varsha. Vikram remarried by arranging a marriage for himself in India. He brings Suman from the warmth of India, to his cold and quiet town. It is not long before Suman has a child of her own and becomes trapped in her new life with her possessive stepdaughter, needy son and violent husband.

With the arrival of Anu as a tenant, Suman finds a friend and confidant. While Vikram is at work and the kids are at school, Anu visits Suman and Vikram’s mother, Akka, as they share stories over tea. With time, Anu starts realizing that there is not only something wrong with Vikram, but with his daughter Varsha as well. Varsha will stop at nothing to keep her family together and protect all of their secrets. When tragedy strikes and questions are asked, secrets start exposing themselves and threatening to break apart a family that was already hanging by a thread.

Characters:

I think the author did a fantastic job painting a picture of what domestic abuse does to children. In my opinion, the only strong, well developed characters in this book are the children.

Varsha is a thirteen-year-old girl with so much darkness in her. She was raised in a violent environment. She observed violence and experienced it herself. Seeing excuses made for her father’s abusive ways somehow embeds the idea in her head that sometimes extreme measures need to be taken to keep a family together. Something you see her do time and time again in the book. I’ll be honest, this girl creeped me out! I kept thinking something is not right with this girl, and I kept reading just to figure her out. She somehow reminded me of those crazy villains in slasher movies who are hiding in closets with a huge knife. Don’t worry she doesn’t do this….or does she? (evil laugh). No, she doesn’t but she gives off that kind of vibe.

Hemant is seven-years-old and your heart will break for him. He grasps onto any form of love given to him and is constantly battling with the secret thoughts he has about how his father and sister are bad people. While at times I felt like I was reading a perspective of a much older person rather than a seven-year-old, I still think that his character came a long way in terms of growth.

My heart did hurt for Suman as I read about what her life was once like and how it is reduced to daily violence. The author does a good job in showing how Suman feels suffocated in a loveless marriage and in an isolated cold town. She misses her culture, her family and the happiness she felt when she was free to live as she wished. The problem with this character is that I saw no growth. I was rooting for her every step of the way but I felt like her storyline did not progress much. Even with the arrival of Anu and their growing friendship, I felt like there really seemed to be no point to her perspective in the story as nothing was happening. While Anu was an interesting addition, I did not feel like I knew her well towards the end of the story. I felt no connection to her despite the fact that she plays a central role in the story.

Akka, the kid’s grandmother, was a very interesting character and had the potential to be so much more. Here is a woman that told stories without sugarcoating them for the youngsters. She spoke openly and freely. The scenes with her in them gave the story some life and I really believe that if she was given more depth and space she would have taken the story further. I felt like her storyline was just left hanging and I was sitting there asking “But where did Akka go? Can Akka come back?”. I’ll admit I mainly wanted her back because she seemed to have her own chilling secret. I guess the author left it open to interpretation for the readers.

Overall thoughts:

While this book did keep me engaged for the most part, I was disappointed in how everything was wrapped up in the end. The story was very bleak and I would have hoped to see some flicker of hope for the characters, but I did not. I felt like after everything I had been through with these characters, we were all left hanging. I finished the book feeling mainly annoyed by the potential the story had to be so much more.

The mystery presented in the very first chapter also added an element of suspense but after a while there was no more urgency for that particular part of the story. Despite all this, I do think the book had some very important take away messages about how a home environment can really shape children’s personalities in ways we could never imagine. Give this book a try if you like books that explore culture and family secrets with a light mystery. 

Happy reading!

Shazia.

p.s. I’m still haunted by that girl in this book. There is a reason why I avoid horror movies with children in them (or all horror movies, period). 

Book Review

Help Me by Marianne Power

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*Thank you to HarperCollins Canada for sending me a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

It is truly a great feeling when a book surprises you in the best of ways. “Help Me” by Marianne Power is one of those books for me. This is a true story of one woman’s quest to build the life she desperately wants through self-help books. This book will make you laugh but it will also make you reflect on the big questions asked by the author. It is equally hysterical and thought provoking. In short, it was one hell of a ride that made me laugh out loud in public (I suspect onlookers were confused as to how I was laughing so much while reading a book titled “Help Me”)

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Synopsis:

“There comes a point in every woman’s life when she realizes that things cannot carry on the way they are” – Marianne Power.

On the surface, Marianne’s life seems great. She’s a thirty-six year old freelance journalist living in London. She has supportive group of family and friends. She wears designer clothes and travels often. However, deep down Marianne feels unfulfilled, lost and behind in life. As Marianne is nursing a bad hangover one Sunday morning, she comes to a realization that things need to change. She decides to turn to the world of self-help books to help her become a perfect person, with the perfect weight, living in a perfect home with a perfect life partner. The problem with this plan: there is no such thing as perfect.

Marianne embarks on a twelve-month journey in which she will read one self-help book per month. She decides that she will not only read self-help, she will DO self-help. She will follow the advice given in these books, no matter how scary it is. What follows is a year filled with uncomfortable challenges, facing fears and questioning damaging subconscious thoughts.

Does Self-Help Really Help?

“The dangerous expectation that can be created by self-help books is that if you’re not walking around like a cross between Mary Poppins, Buddha and Jesus every day you’re doing it wrong. You must try harder.” – Marianne Power

Marianne starts her self-help journey with the book “Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway” by Susan Jeffers. This book inspires her to do things that she is afraid of, and so she writes up a list of scary things she would never imagine doing. She finds herself becoming a nude model for an art class, chatting up a random man on public transport, doing stand up comedy, and skydiving. I loved reading this chapter specifically because you could really feel her fear through her writing. I know there were times when I was cringing and feeling proud of her at the same time.

Perhaps my favorite part of the book was the chapter on rejection therapy, a game created by Jason Comely in which the goal is to seek out rejection in order to overcome the fear of rejection. It was an absolute riot reading the scenes where Marianne asked for free coffee, a discount in store and asked to join strangers at cafes. Her inner dialogue is gold! This chapter was not only funny, but eye opening as well. It turns out that even when Marianne was searching for rejection, she would not always get it. People would surprise her with their kindness and openness, leaving Marianne to realize that she had gone out of her way to avoid rejection her whole life and barely lived as a result.

The Downside to Self-Help:

As her journey progresses, Marianne explores more self-help books like “The Secret” by Rhonda Byrne, “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People” by Stephen R. Covey and attended a Tony Robbins seminar called “Unleash the Power Within”. What starts as an inspirational journey becomes overwhelming and Marianne soon becomes burnt out from all the self-helping. She finds herself alone with all the voices of the authors in her head leaving her feeling even more emotionally exhausted. I really think this portion of the book is important as it shows what happens when you go too far with these books. A self-help plan can be equal parts self-growth and alienating if not done right.

As Marianne realizes her friends and family are starting to worry and pulling away, she presses pause and reexamines her commitment to reading self-help. Perhaps this is the most important part of her self-growth as she looks into her own behavior and realizes she does not have do all this on her own. That asking for help from actual people and reconnecting with the people she loves can be just as empowering. It is with this realization that she takes a giant leap forward and continues with reading what turn out to be the three books that leave the biggest impact: “The Power of Now” by Eckhart Tolle, “Daring Greatly” by Brene Brown and “You Can Heal Your Life” by Louise Hay. I believe the reason why these books made the greatest impact was because she realized a journey towards self-development does not have to be taken alone.

My Thoughts:

This book was unlike any other nonfiction book I have read before. It is deeply personal, vulnerable and hilarious. At times, it felt like I was reading a novel, mainly because of the hilarious dialogue between Marianne and her mother. The mother’s advice, skepticism and genuine concern were both hysterical and endearing.

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I found myself laughing, gasping, feeling sad and rooting for the author every step of the way. The chapters are broken down according to the self-help book the author was reading. Marianne manages to capture the biggest lessons from every book she reads. If you enjoy nonfiction books that are funny and inspiring, then this book is for you. In fact, I think this book can be for anyone. You do not have to like or even appreciate self-help books to enjoy this deeply personal story.

Happy reading!

Shazia.

 

 

 

 

 

Book Review

The Gown by Jennifer Robson

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It truly takes a gifted author to write a historical fiction that not only pulls at your heartstrings but also makes you feel like you are back in that time living it through the characters. The Gown by Jennifer Robson is truly a gift that I enjoyed immensely.

This book is about survival.

While there are many themes that the author expertly covers, survival was the one that stuck with me till the very last page.

There are many books that are written about the war or during the war, but The Gown focuses on the aftermath. It focuses on how people pick up the pieces of their lives and rebuild brick by brick. It is about friendship, love, creation, PTSD and a person’s legacy. The Gown takes us on this journey as each of the main characters experience life altering events that take them to places they would have never imagined.

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Synopsis:

“Millions will welcome this joyous event as a flash of color on the long road we have to travel.”—Sir Winston Churchill on the news of Princess Elizabeth’s forthcoming wedding

London 1947: A brutal winter, rationing of resources and tragic memories leaves many people feeling the harsh aftermath of World War II. Ann Hughes and Miriam Dassin are embroiderers working for Norman Hartell, the famous designer who has been chosen to make the wedding gown for Princess Elizabeth. Ann and Miriam, each weighed down by memories of their past, set to work on the gown for the royal wedding. They become closer, forging a friendship that will help them both during their darkest times.

Toronto 2016: Heather Mackenzie is mourning the death of her grandmother. While helping her mother go through her Nan’s things, she discovers a box with her name on it containing embroidered flowers that resemble the flowers on Queen Elizabeth’s wedding gown. Heather knows very little about her Nan’s past, but with some digging she discovers a clue that leads her to believe that her Nan once helped create the Queen’s dress. Heather boards a plane to London in search of the answers to her questions.

Themes:

I always wondered how the people living during this time were able to rebuild their lives after the brutality of WWII. How difficult it must have been for the survivors to carry the knowledge that their loved ones had died in concentration camps? How did the world heal? The Gown shows us that friendship can be the foundation of survival and moving on. The author takes us through what post-war London would have looked like through the eyes of fictional characters Ann Hughes and Miriam Dassin. We read about their long workdays as they stitched and embroidered the gown for the royal wedding. As we read along, we see a beautiful friendship developing between these two strong women.

The theme of survival guilt is also explored in this story as we are shown how the survivors feel guilt about roaming free in the new world while their families were brutalized and murdered. This kind of guilt is portrayed expertly in the story and it shows how breaking down the walls people put up to protect themselves and letting someone in can be the first step into acceptance of the past and moving forward.

 “It was hard, at times to ignore the disquieting voices that told her she was fooling herself, that she would empty herself into this misguided project, and when she finished, it would be to find that no one was interested. That no one on earth, apart from her, cared to know what had happened to those she loved” – Jennifer Robson

Another theme that is beautifully depicted is how art and creation have their own healing powers, not just for the creators but also for those viewing the art. The royal wedding was held during a time of despair, as if to give a spark of light to the nation that was shrouded in darkness for far too long. The Gown would become a piece of art that captures the interest of the onlookers, but also provided it’s own kind of therapy to Miriam and Ann as they worked tirelessly on it.

Overall Thoughts:

The Gown was a truly breathtaking book to read. Everything was so descriptive that it felt like I could see the scenes in my head. I could almost see Ann and Miriam hunched over their frames in their coveralls stitching the elaborate flower star designs onto the gown. I could feel the emotions they were feeling. I could feel Ann’s heartbreak, Miriam’s guilt and Heather’s loss. I also enjoyed the way the story jumped from past to present and how we learn details of Ann and Miriam’s lives through Heather’s search for answers. This book had a lot of heart and it pulled many tears from me.

In many ways, this book reminds us that when elaborate gowns are made, so much of the credit goes to the designer and hardly any goes towards the ones who worked on the embroidery. I have a newfound appreciation for all those dedicated souls who put all their time and love into the delicate details that are what makes a dress beautiful. Now if you will excuse me, I’m going to Google images of Queen Elizabeth’s wedding gown to admire the embroidery.

Check out The Gown at Chapters Indigo.

Happy reading!

Shazia.

Book Review

The Water Cure by Sophie Mackintosh

Shazia2 Comments

Thank you to Penguin Random House Canada for sending me a copy of The Water Cure in exchange for an honest review.

 There have been quite a few feminist dystopian novels like the Handmaid’s Tale and The Virgin Suicides that have been written. However, comparing The Water Cure to those books would be wrong. In my opinion, this book stands alone as something else entirely. Yes, the book does describe a world in which being a female is considered a disadvantage, but the book reads as if it is all happening in the present. While some people may argue that this book is still considered to be a dystopian, I personally did not see that reflected in the writing. My advice? Go into this book without expectations. This will not be a book for everyone, but it is so inherently unique that I think it deserves a chance to be explored by readers.

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Synopsis:

“There is a fluidity to his movements, despite his size, that tells me he has never had to justify his existence, has never had to fold himself into a hidden thing, and I wonder what that must be like, to know that your body is irreproachable.” – Sophie Mackintosh

The Water Cure introduces us to a man named King who has created a home in an isolated territory for his wife and three daughters, Grace, Lia and Sky. There is barbered wire around this territory that gives clear messages of “do not enter” and “do not leave”. King does this to protect the women from the dangers and violence from the men on the mainland. King and his wife have their daughters engage in brutal therapies that are meant to make their bodies and minds strong against the toxic world beyond their barbed wires. The girls are made to believe that the men of the world will harm them and that they could become sick from the mere toxicity from their breaths.

Their carefully orchestrated life turns upside down when King disappears and three men wash ashore. They seek shelter in the girl’s home and from this point onwards everything changes. The three men, James, Llew and Gwil are mysterious and quietly take over the role of King to protect the women. We see the sisters navigate their first experiences interacting with men. We also see the bonds of sisterhood tested and how they struggle to come to terms with their new reality.

The Characters:

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Most of the story is told through Lia’s perspective. Lia is the middle child who yearns for love and finds herself drawn to one of the men washed ashore. She continuously battles over the guilt and fear of being drawn to “the enemy”, someone who could easily kill her. We are taken through flashbacks as Lia recounts rituals in which she had to hurt her sisters or kill animals in order to strengthen her body and mind. These parts were difficult to read as the author really masters how to make you feel uncomfortable. Lia’s perspective takes up the middle portion of the story, and while I did find this part to be a bit slow and dragged out, I still feel that the character development was well done. You really feel Lia’s pain and how desperately she wants to be loved.

Perhaps the most interesting character for me was the eldest daughter, Grace. We only get Grace’s perspective at the very beginning and end of the book. In my opinion, these were the best parts of the book. Grace gives us more insight into the mysterious character of King. We are told he is their father, that he protects them from the toxins of the outside world and tries to help other “sick” women. It is through Grace that we learn the truth about King and his motive. It is through her that the story finally starts to make sense and loose ends are tied.

James, Llew and Gwil are mysterious characters. Llew is the father of the young boy Gwil. James is Llew’s brother. From the very first time we are introduced to these characters, I got a sense that something was wrong. The author does not provide much information about them, and we learn more about them through their actions and interactions with the sisters. I was constantly on edge waiting to learn their motives. When everything is revealed, it was quite the surprise.

The Story:

I think the most interesting thing about this book for me is how the story is written. The author does a good job in showing rather than telling. We are not told what kind of world the women live in. Instead we are shown through the perspectives of Lia and Grace. At one point the author even does a group perspective, which I believe is an incredibly hard thing to accomplish. The author nails it! I really felt the collective emotions of the sisters in these chapters. At times I felt myself feeling lost because of the way we were given little context but a lot of description. I had to really pay attention and think through what I was reading. There were many beautiful metaphors with the use of water. The writing itself was poetic, mystical even at times.

The themes of cult mentality, patriarchy and trauma are deeply explored in the story, but again it is shown to the readers through Lia’s flashbacks and emotional turmoil. We are given more information about the girl’s childhood, their parent’s expectations and how/when they are allowed to express their emotions. The water cure was eventually explained and it left me feeling uneasy but also invested in finding out more. I was beginning to feel a bit impatient for more information but it was all eventually unraveled. While the ending did feel a tad bit rushed, I was so relieved to get the full story that I did not mind.

This was not an easy book to read. At times I felt horrified, uncomfortable and a bit impatient. I was really a mixed bag of emotions and I spent a good portion of time after I was done reading thinking about how I felt about the whole experience. I realized that all those emotions meant the author did a good job in evoking a response from readers. No matter what you feel after you’re done reading, the fact remains that you felt something. Even if the feeling was anger, frustration, sadness or discomfort. The writing makes you feel, period. This for me is a good reading experience.

Happy reading bookworms!

Shazia.

 

Book Review

Book Review: Notes on a Nervous Planet by Matt Haig

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Publisher: HarperCollins

I would like to thank HarperCollins Canada for sending me a copy of Notes on a Nervous Planet by Matt Haig in exchange for an honest review.

This was an inspiring and thought-provoking book to read. It is truly refreshing when an author shares his or her personal journey with readers. To feel an author’s vulnerability in their writing is a beautiful thing and to reflect on your own life afterwards is where the magic happens.

Matt Haig is one of those authors that takes you along on his personal journey and helps you understand the lessons he learned along the way. This book explores the link between anxiety, stress and our modern world. It is not just meant for the Millennials or the Generation Y group. This book is aimed for all humans who live on this nervous planet.

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Notes on a Nervous Planet

We have come a long way when it comes to discussing mental health. However, in this book Matt points out an interesting thing that we do when people discuss their mental health issues. He discusses how people continue to say things like “You are so brave for sharing your story”. As pointed out in the book, it should not be thought of as being brave for someone to have shared his or her struggles. It should be considered normal.

I paused when I read this and thought back to all the times I used a similar phrase when reading or listening to someone’s story. It’s a completely valid point that I thought should be shared. While there were many themes in this book, I would like to discuss the three big ones that stood out for me: Technology overload, loss of connection and life overload.

Technology Overload:

We live in a chaotic, overly stimulating and faced paced world. More than ever before we are being bombarded with notifications from the overwhelming amount of apps we have on our phones. We have to comb through text messages, whatsapp messages, emails, tweets, direct messages and Facebook messenger messages. Matt describes how this can be anxiety provoking. He describes the feeling of being on high alert while waiting for text messages or when receiving new notifications. We are constantly plugged in and being distracted.

Matt acknowledges how hard it can be to distance yourself from your phone and he shares his own struggles. However, he provides useful tips on how to control social media time rather than letting it control you. He recognizes the struggles with advancing technology, but also acknowledges the positives. This book does not bash technology and blame it all for our unhappiness. On the contrary, it presents the problems we may face and provides us with advice on how to create a space to foster peace and shape the life we want.

Loss of Connection:

Matt describes how the rise of the Internet and social media makes us more connected but also physically draws us further apart. An interesting point is made about how many things that pulled us out of our homes in the past are now available on the Internet. It is also so much easier to communicate with friends and family via Skype and Facetime rather than putting all that effort into getting out into the world to meet them. Loneliness seems to be one of the side effects of social media. I loved how Matt offers readers tips on how to remain human in a world that has become addicted to cell phones. It resonated with me as I sometimes find myself scanning the the people on the bus and counting how many of them have their cell phones in their hands, myself included.

Life Overload:

Matt refers to our world as a global nervous system. We are connected in more ways than ever thanks to technology like the Internet and the telephone. I think one of the most interesting points of this book was that because we have become so globally connected, we might feel emotions collectively through this large nervous system. We feel the group’s emotions and these emotions become our own. We get reminded of a time when we got our news with the morning newspaper and the evening news. That’s it. Just twice a day.

These days, news coverage goes beyond the newspaper and CNN. It is also present in the trending topics of Facebook, discussed on Twitter, shared on Instagram and Google news offers us a plethora of news articles to comb through. There is definitely an information overload, especially when the news being presented revolves around topics that sadden or frighten us. This book explains how it can be anxiety provoking, leading us to stress more and become anxious over the impending doom that may befall on us.

My Thoughts:

This was such an enjoyable book to read. I really can’t say that there is anything that I disliked about this book. It was broken down into sections that are quick and easy to read. There are many themes that are explored through funny anecdotes, lists and short discussions. It was an honest and insightful account about how to live your best life possible in a modern world that is designed to make you feel anxious. It is about creating a space of peace for yourself, to unplug and live in the moment. I think we could all benefit from Matt Haig’s reminders and advice. Highly recommended!

Happy reading,

Shazia.

Book Review

Is There Still a Stigma Around Self-Help Books?

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I notice an acquaintance, let’s call her Jane, clutching a book to her chest. It is bright yellow and I immediately recognize it.

Me: “Are you reading, “You are a Badass” by Jen Sincero?”

Jane: “Oh, yeah I am. I got it as a gift or else I would never pick it up myself. I usually don’t do self-help books”.

Me: “I loved that book! I read it twice”

Jane: “Oh really? That’s good. I hope I enjoy it. I don’t care for self-help books, but it seems funny”.

It is then that I notice the subtle signs of discomfort: her nervous laugh, the way she hides the title by holding it to her chest and how she shifts from one foot to another. Not to mention, she states she doesn’t care for self-help books twice.

This whole interaction made me wonder: Is there a stigma when it comes to reading self-help books?

I have seen it a few times over the years. Discomfort when someone sees me reading a self-help book. Sometimes it’s an eye-roll, other times I see an eyebrow raising and a few times it’s been a downright “you read that stuff?”

Well, yes I do. In fact, I love this “stuff”.

The Good News:

In the last few years, I have seen more enthusiasm related to self-help books. I have seen these books on display more often than before. I have listened to podcasts with the authors from this genre discussing their books. I have also seen these books included in popular book clubs. More of these kinds of books are shared on platforms like bookstagram and goodreads.
Chapters Indigo even has a section called “The Wellness Shop”, which features a whole array of self-help books related to self-development, meditation, coping with anxiety and alleviating stress. I have met people who asked questions about self-help books. I have had lengthy discussions about the themes and topics covered by the authors regarding mental health. This often leads to stories being shared about our personal struggles and how we incorporated teachings from these books into our lives. These are the conversations we need more of in our lives.

The Resistance:

What makes some people uncomfortable about being seen in the self-help section of the bookstore? What makes some people uncomfortable about reading their self-help books in public? Is it the idea that seeking these books is a form of weakness? Is it the fear of judgment from others?

I truly believe that people’s resistance to self-help books is basically centered on a lack of knowledge about this genre. Some people may think these books are filled with schemes. Others may think these books provide a false notion of “you will be fixed by the end of Chapter 20”. A few may even believe that there is nothing written that we don’t already know.

There may be some truth to these ideas. I’m not saying all self-help books are wonderful and contain pixie dust that will “bippity boppity boo” away all your insecurities and struggles. What I am saying is the genre itself deserves to be treated with an open mind. So next time you see someone roll their eyes or raise an eyebrow so high it looks like it’s about to shoot off their forehead, maybe try to have a discussion. Maybe ask the person why they dislike self-help books. Share why you like this particular book you are reading. You don’t have to change their mind or bring them over to your side, but sometimes a conversation can lead to openness or just a great book related conversation.

My Favorite Self-Help Books

I can’t do a blog post about this genre and not include some of my favorites.
Here are some of the self-help books that I found immensely important and life changing. I believe that for a self-help book to be a success, you need to feel a certain level of vulnerability from the author. You also have to be willing to feel your own vulnerability. Here is my top five list:

1) Good Vibes, Good Life – Vex King

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I have been gushing about this book since Christmas to everyone who will listen to me and I have no intention to stop anytime soon. Vex King is such a gifted author who shares his own life experiences and the lessons he learned along the way. I love books that promote self-love and positive vibes.

2) Daring Greatly – Brene Brown

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Brene Brown spent twelve years getting up close and personal with vulnerability. She shares her years of research and her own personal struggles with vulnerability and helps us realize that vulnerability is where courage can be found. There is so much to learn from this book as it left me reflecting on my own thoughts and experiences.

3) The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck – Mark Manson

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While many self-help books and social media quotes focus solely on positivity, Mark Manson discusses the importance on how to stop being positive all the time so that we can truly become happier people. It is an interesting concept about how we need to fully feel our sad moments in order to move forward.

4) You are a Badass – Jen Sincero

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This book is badass! The author has a great way of weaving humour and real life experiences to ultimately help readers love their badass selves. Lots of laugh out loud moments and advice that makes you think about living your best life.

5) Unlearn: 101 Simple Truths for a Better Life – Humble the Poet

This book is a collection of writings and insightful quotes to remind you of your potential and ways of thinking to deal with whatever life throws your way. I loved the little lessons that were shared. This book is both insightful and motivational.

Final Thoughts:
We have come a long way as mental health awareness is being discussed more and many authors are stepping forward with their stories. Is there a stigma? I believe we are seeing less and less of it. There may always be some level of discomfort either from the reader or from the outside world. What’s important is that we keep talking about it and sharing the message from these books. Sometimes all people need is a gentle reminder of self-love from authors who want to spread their message and help the heal the world one page at a time.

Happy reading!

Shazia.